IMMAAD ASAHATTER!
In view of wide diversity in the world's religions, The Church of Gonz
would like to introduce it's new prophet, IMMAAD ASAHATTER.
would like to introduce it's new prophet, IMMAAD ASAHATTER.
IMMAAD will be heading the Eastern Division of The Church and is
busily designing services aimed at fulfilling valuable needs he thinks
will satisfy a large number of the target group in mind. As usual, we
aim to please, so if you have any suggestions or services you think
will add to our successful expansion, please send them in.
Meanwhile we have some rough ideas we are working on and have
listed them below.
busily designing services aimed at fulfilling valuable needs he thinks
will satisfy a large number of the target group in mind. As usual, we
aim to please, so if you have any suggestions or services you think
will add to our successful expansion, please send them in.
Meanwhile we have some rough ideas we are working on and have
listed them below.
IMMAAD! IMMAAD! IMMAAD!!
WORSHIP IN FIREPROOF, CONCRETE AND STEEL BUILDINGS >>>>>>>>>
People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.
PILGRIMAGES We can organize you, Pilgrims! Bus, train, air, auto, maps, and gear .
WORKSHOPS
Wide variety of workshops such as: Exercising Intolerance, Walking
Screaming and Carrying Your Own Stones, Martyr Training,
Stampede Starting/Avoiding, Tips for the Happy Pilgrim, Breaking
Windows and Starting Fires, Slogan Chanting, Writing Effective
Slogans, Face/Head Wrapping, Selecting Proper Gear for a Rock
Fight, Sign Making, Promoting and preserving your Ignorance (it may
be all you ever need), Hateful Banter and When to Use It, How to Burn
the Right Embassy, Wall Climbing, Who to Hate and Why, and much,
much more.
Screaming and Carrying Your Own Stones, Martyr Training,
Stampede Starting/Avoiding, Tips for the Happy Pilgrim, Breaking
Windows and Starting Fires, Slogan Chanting, Writing Effective
Slogans, Face/Head Wrapping, Selecting Proper Gear for a Rock
Fight, Sign Making, Promoting and preserving your Ignorance (it may
be all you ever need), Hateful Banter and When to Use It, How to Burn
the Right Embassy, Wall Climbing, Who to Hate and Why, and much,
much more.
FLAGS ARE BAD!!
WE HATE FLAGS!!
WE HATE FLAGS!!
ZEALOT SUPPLIES / GREAT GEAR!
Sack of Smiters, there will be three different sized bags with shoulder straps
for easy carrying. All stones will be perfect throwing weight between 1/8 to
9/16 pounders for maximum distance and impact. Also: Sacred Shit Sack,
goat and dog droppings, perfect for desecrating on the run!.
for easy carrying. All stones will be perfect throwing weight between 1/8 to
9/16 pounders for maximum distance and impact. Also: Sacred Shit Sack,
goat and dog droppings, perfect for desecrating on the run!.
Sign Making Materials, such as ink and brushes, large felt pens, paper
and poster board, sticks, pocket dictionaries, staple guns, Elmers Glue etc.
and poster board, sticks, pocket dictionaries, staple guns, Elmers Glue etc.
Righteous Running Shoes, For a man on the run! Nike, Adidas, Converse
and many other famous brands for all your marching, attacking and
running-away needs. flame-proof soles available NOW!
and many other famous brands for all your marching, attacking and
running-away needs. flame-proof soles available NOW!
Incendiary Devices, matches, lighters, rags, bottles and bomb-wrapped
martyrs of the highest quality.
martyrs of the highest quality.
Prayer Mats, lightweight and portable, easy on the knees, quality
materials. Many designs, deities, and icons available. save on quantity!
materials. Many designs, deities, and icons available. save on quantity!
"Watching you burn brings great
joy to me, and my whole family."
joy to me, and my whole family."
Shawls, Scarfs and Face-Wraps, multi-colored and designed with
anonymity in mind. AND...they look GREAT!
anonymity in mind. AND...they look GREAT!
Cell Phones, untraceable and compact, perfect for co-ordination and
privacy. Many brands and service providers! (security chips extra)
privacy. Many brands and service providers! (security chips extra)
Lunch and Boda Bags, gotta get hungry out there marching, burning
things and throwing stones. Our pocket lunches include well wrapped
goat cheeses, stale breads...and bota-bags full of warm goat milk, wine
or gasoline to fuel your flames. also Energy bars, Coke and peanuts !!
things and throwing stones. Our pocket lunches include well wrapped
goat cheeses, stale breads...and bota-bags full of warm goat milk, wine
or gasoline to fuel your flames. also Energy bars, Coke and peanuts !!
FLAGS AND STUFFED DOLLS, made of highly flammable material! These
flags and dolls represent the reprehensible! Satisfaction guaranteed!
flags and dolls represent the reprehensible! Satisfaction guaranteed!
I'm mad as hell!
This sign needs some work.
GONZ PRAISE, IMMAAD ASAHATTER!!
Many hot new
products in
development,
like the
spring-loaded
placard stick
for easy, most
active
sign-bobbing!!
>>>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>
products in
development,
like the
spring-loaded
placard stick
for easy, most
active
sign-bobbing!!
>>>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>
We also sell
"NEO-CON"
Gear!
"NEO-CON"
Gear!
IMMAAD sayeth: If it is thee right
hand that taketh my falafel, then
the right hand cometh off.
hand that taketh my falafel, then
the right hand cometh off.
This Brit thinks so, but I fear his days
are numbered..Gonz Bless Him!
are numbered..Gonz Bless Him!